• College Cheaters!

      College Cheaters!
      by GayLord Jacobs

      This College Admissions Cheating scandal involving the Uppity Ups bribing various entities so that their ineligible, unqualified (and in some instances) uneducated, offspring could cheat their way into passing their SAT test, thereby gaining entry into prestigious universities, is getting quite messy! I mean, come on. Why do such a thing? So that as the pretentious ass parents that you are, you’d have the opportunity of gushing that your child attends Yale, Georgetown, UCLA, wherever!? Umm hmm, it’s always you motherfuckers…

      Granted, most parents want to see their progeny excel thus not struggle by recreating and enduring familiar hardships from the past. With that, parents strive to give their kids a head start by ensuring that their maturing offspring receives some form of advancement towards their future. This initiated incentive is contributed in an effort to abate the possibility of their young falling prey to being mired down in bad credit that stays strapped to the kids’ back for the next 25 years!

      These parental generosities come by way of parents doing such things as: paying their child’s college tuition, gifting their kid the down payment, or considerable sum toward, their first home, paying their child’s wedding expenses, etcetera. You know, normal parental bragging rights shit.

      Now, the aforementioned indulgences may be just a drop in the bucket to some, but on behalf of the working class, that shit is a BIG FUCKING DEAL!

      That said, exactly what degree of parent imparts lying, cheating, dishonesty and scandal as their family values!? I mean, if your aspirations are for your pre-adult to become the local Bookie, fine. Otherwise, not so fine.

      During the course of federal prosecutors investigating this scandal, an overwhelming theme is with the involved universities’ athletic coaches accepting bribes in exchange for either ensuring applicants’ entrances into its sports programs, or lying about the applicant actually being in the program.

      See people, this is why your Elders tell you to never rely on sports abilities to pave your way! Your athletic skills are not the issue. The problem is that, no matter how great you may be, greatness alone does not guarantee that you will be treated fairly and/or offered a seat at the table! Especially if the sacks of shit University Athletic Administrators are holding your fate in their hands!

      The same goes for children that possess outstanding academic abilities. [And] the fact that some of the participants in this scandal were SAT Test Administrators is a rigid bitch slap to the face!

      This is not merely some White Collar Crime bullshit! These motherfuckers should go to jail! And do you know why?

      Example: If DeAndre Shamar Johnson, who outscored Brendan Trevor Winthrop (on the SATs) had NOT been cheated out of his scoring placement, he would have rightfully been acceptable by the colleges to which he applied.

      Therefore, DeAndre Shamar Johnson would not currently be employed at a fucked up Blue Collar job as I presently sit here and type out my ire! And for the record, NO, there is absolutely nothing wrong with working a blue collar job. However, why drive the trash truck when you can own the motherfucking company!?

      My family was a part of the “I have to work EVERY DAMN DAY Working Class.” But, even if they had possessed the financial wherewithal to bribe my way into an advantageously set future, THEY WOULD NOT HAVE DONE SO!

      Unlike these cheaters who plunked down a minimum of $50,000.00 to solidify the immorality of their children’s futures, my family would have been on the opposite end of the spectrum. They would have spent that entire $50k on tutoring lessons! As such, it would have ensured that (I) was well fucking capable, and prepared, to ace my own tests!


      In loving your brood, don’t forget to properly raise them along the way!